Marriage

I have been watching a lot of Netflix movies. I watched a documentary today called "the farmer#s wi*fe" and it was very interesting. In this film there was a couple who had married young and began farming right away. They started a family right away as well.

After they were married a few years, the weather caused their crop to be bad, for years. They continued to struggle and their marriage suffered as well. He was a very very hard worker. And she cleaned houses 2 days a week while her older two kids were in school. She was bitter about having to work and not be a stay at home mom. Needless to say, most of his thoughts were about the farm but he also worked a full time job on the side so they could afford to eat! They had no clue about finances but finally she started learning about the farm finances once they were about to lose everything. She also started school in order to get an associates in business.

The thing is through the entire documentary she blamed him for her not being able to be a stay at home mom. She was upset he was so fixated on the farm. Her family members(brothers and sisters) were highly successful and were not happy about her being so poor and they let her know it all the time. The more she listened to them, the more she began to be negative towards her husband. He went to counseling with her because she wanted him to and their marriage did get better.
For awhile.

I read (after I watched this documentary) that they got divorced shortly after it aired. It made me a little sad. Not only for them but for their kids as well. I think they really loved each other but finances and things that were said had taken their toll.

Anybody who is married, or has been married, knows it is hard. Sometimes I lose my shit on my husband. He has a lot of health problems, mainly his back. His last MRI showed cracks in his lower vertebrae. Where this woman got frustrated because her husband did not spend enough time with his kids, I feel the same way but for completely different reasons. My husband cannot physically do a lot due to his back, and her husband was breaking his back to try to make a go of the farm and also work a full time job. To me he was quite a man but she always wanted more. Yet I know how hard it is to have financial problems.

Hopefully they are both in a much better place with their new spouses..both have remarried. He is still farming and she is working for the farm tax department. I guess what I am saying is we all have our battles and it is up to us how to deal with them. My husband and I are doing well and I am receiving more understanding from him on how I feel. I am also less stressed because I am home full time (for now) and I have free time just to do what I want for a change!!

We will see what the future holds, sometimes we just never know.