My family is crazy as hell

So I get home yesterday and I was in a good mood suprisingly. Sara cracked me up asking were we moving to South Carolina? And I was like, "HELLS NO!" She sighed in relief because her friend told her South Carolina has the highest teen pregnancy rate in the U.S.
WHAT THE FUCK?

Anyways, I sat down and my husband told me his plan is for me to be a stay at home Mom. Geez. He had it all worked out complete with, "We are selling the house and moving into an apartment."

Again, WHAT THE FUCK?

He has lost his damn mind. For reals.

For once I was not the one freaking out, he was. I told him that I am going to use my severance and unemployment and we will be fine and NO we are not selling our house and I am not going to be a stay at home Mom. I will get a damn job and that will be that!